Today I had lunch w/Audrey, Cyndy & Andria. It was cool. Straight up girl talk. I miss girl talk. It's really funny how close Audrey and I have become. I can't believe also how much we have in common. I worry about Audrey sometimes. I worry that her long distance relationship w/Keith is taking a toll on her and stressing her. I know she really likes him so I'm really hoping it works out for them. The relationship w/Audrey and I reminds me a lot of the relationship I have w/Rashida. Started off as co-workers and quickly became good friends. I love that girl. OMG...Cyndy!!! You should see her arms!!!! It reminds me of Tina Turner's arms. That girl is cut. She told me she spent $1200 on her personal trainer at Bally's! DAMN!!!! That is money well spent!!!!
I haven't felt too good these past couple of days. I think I'm stressing myself over the results of the tests. My stomach has been hurting. My neck has been hurting. I'm having a hard time concentrating. It's tough just sitting down and waiting. Especially cuz I feel like I don't have anyone to talk to about it you know. I mean I talk to Audrey cuz she can relate but I wish I can talk to someone more in detail you know. I miss CMM. She would totally understand and make me feel at ease.
Anyway...I feel like I want to go to NYC and visit my family and friends. I miss them. I know I always say I'm not going back to Brooklyn but I miss them.
I'm getting sick of Genentech little by little. I don't know what I'm expecting. Maybe I have false expectations. I'm ready to leave CA.
I'm sitting home watching the presidential debate w/L. I'm sitting next to him thinking about us. Thinking about what our future is going to be. I think I have a crush on OBAMA :) But he has nothing on my Mr. DuBose :)
I wonder if I can fall in love w/him??? I wonder if he can ever fall in love w/me??? It's going to be very hard for me to fall in love. I wish I could love him now. OMG...we had an argument over a game today. CRAZY!!!! Some of the things he say to me is so hurtful. I try to man up and take it but man is it hard. Sometimes he reminds me of Daddy and you know that shit aint cool. I like him so much.
So my birthday is next week Saturday. OMG...I'm going to be 32 years old. I really love my 30's. So this is the first time in years that I don't have any plans. Well I had plans but I cancelled them once I started getting serious w/L. I know he's not much of a people person and I just really wanted to be w/him on my bday. I just want to be w/him all the time. Seems like all we've been doing is fighting. It hurts me. I hate fighting. I hate it. We argue about stupid shit. Anyway...I just want to be w/him on my birthday. So hopefully cross your fingers they'll be no fight on October 4th, 2008 :)
